This was a tough day. I met a 50-year-old woman from Puerto Rico last night and walked with her today. It was nice to have her company, but she constantly wanted to stop. “Oh look at that serpent symbol on the door. Ohhh, look at that snail on the floor.” Are you kidding me? Let´s walk, already. I just want to get to the next stop and not think much about my surroundings or the fact that I´m in Spain. Here´s why today sucked:
1) My ex was in my head today, which always sucks. We don´t talk anymore and I just want to be able to detach myself the way she has. I know this won´t last forever, but it bugged me today. I wish I could just stop my brain from thinking about anything, but my brain is too awesome.
2) The trail was nto a trail. It was a highway. I walked through industrial centers all damn day. It didn´t feel like a hike or a pilgrimage.
3) My right leg seems to be falling apart. While my joints and muscles feel fine, I think it´s the tendons that ache with every step. I stopped early today and, if it continues, I won´t be able to finish this.
4) I feel more lost than ever. Why am I doing this? It´s not accomplishing anything I´d hoped. I´m not forgetting any of the little sorrow I have, and I don´t feel like I have a purpose. BJ said it best: “That´s not a pilgrimage, fool. Your ass is just walking.”
Having said that, I should also note that there were some positive sides to the day:
1) There´s a decent albergue here in Oporiño. I stopped here short to give my leg a rest.
2) I had company in my Puerto Rican companian who has done the camino 4 times already. I can´t imagine doing the same trip so many times.
3) People are friendly. I´ve heard that they´re a lot less genuine in the cities, but I´ve at least found them to be frinedly in these towns. Not the friendliest in the world, but not ass holes either.
4) My muscled are fine. They´ve gotten used to the routine and are barely sore at the end of the day. Also, I´ve gotten used to carrying around a heavy backpack. It doesn´t bother me at all and feels like a part of me now.
Overall, this has been a bad day. I feel unaccomplished, unmotivated, a little unhappy, and pessimistic about the coming days (which will also happily be rainy). I don´t regret coming on the camino and I´m not miserable. This is just a difficult experience and not the most enjoyable way to spend a vacation. Not for me, anyway. Here´s to hoping for a better tomorrow.
For your pleasure or disgust, an annoying but relevant song:
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A friend of mine once gave me the following comfort-advice: bad decisions make good stories. Ok so maybe you could be discovering just how hot Slavic women are on the beaches of Croatia, or sipping limoncello in Italy or whatever. Maybe that voice telling you that spending your days with a slow Puerto Rican lady is not the best use of your time is right. But you know what? Over the next few months when most of us are telling very similar stories about going to this and that country and getting drunk and seeing churches, you’re going to have some awesome, totally ridiculous unbelievable adventure to share! I don’t know one person who’s ever done what you’re doing. And I have to say, of all the people I know to do ridiculous things, I’m glad that you’re the one to do them, because you’ll be able to recount your stories with the panache they’ll require. I hope we can hang out in the states so I can hear all about it.
remember when we were riding our bikes around austin on a short 10 mile or so trip and we both felt SO good about ourselves after it was done? and that was just 10 stinking miles. you are walking freaking 200+ miles..or whatever it is. even if your leg falls off and you have to hop the rest of the way, finish it. think of how good you’ll feel once it’s all done. not many people can say they’ve done something like this. you’re the man. and post some bloody pictures you stoop kid.
"she constantly wanted to stop. “Oh look at that serpent symbol on the door. Ohhh, look at that snail on the floor.” Are you kidding me? Let´s walk, already."hahahaha
I think it is really amazing that you’re doing this. Most people say they want to do things like this, then never go through with them. As a side note, I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog. I tried to write one while studying in Paris, but gave up on it. You’ve inspired me to give it another try and I’ve already started blogging in preparation of my European adventures to come. Anyway, keep writing because you’re good at it, and keep up with your adventures because they give you amazing things to write about! Well, that’s my unsolicited two cents . . . .
hey kevin, the good think is “tomorrow is another day” and it could be a great day if you like
and of course you need some luck 
que tengas un buen dia y un buen viaje amigo! practica el español, queremos escucharte cuando regreses jeje
Kevin! Tu es sur le chemin des aventuriers tu es un exemple que j’aimerais suivre! Prends tout cela comme ça vient et poursuit ton chemin… marche tout droit jusqu’à la fin de la route et tu comprendras surement ce que seuls ceux qui sont partis savent. Il faut que je te raconte quelque chose mon ami, un jour j’ai rencontré un homme près de chez moi marchant sur le chemin côtier celui même que j’avais emprunter des dizaines de fois. Cet homme avais connu une grande peine et c’est mis a marcher du nord de Brest jusqu’à Santiago de Compostela, pas par conviction religieuse non, simplement pour marcher pour ce rendre compte qu’il pouvait et devait passer à autre chose. Comme toi. Nous sommes jeunes, profitons en, un jour viendra où nous auront sans doute moins envie de “partir”. Faites que ça soit le plus tard possible. Je serais parti avec toi sans hésitation, seulement crois moi les voyages en solitaire ont une autre saveur, même si tu ne t’en rends pas compte, continue. Like Jack Kerouac! on the road again men! Few things to write before…
Thanks for the support, people. You melt my heart.
Bubba, pictures won´t be coming because, just after my bad day, someone stole my beautiful camera with all my pictures on it.
Are you kidding me?? Someone stole your camera after all of that? Goodness! I’m sorry it’s been a bit rough, but honestly, you make me want to give the pilgrimage a try myself! I had no idea this kind of thing even existed!